In a chilling account discussed on the podcast, a Dating Ring user, upon receiving the name and phone number of a match, was said to have replied: “I hope that’s a typo, because that name doesn’t sound white to me.” Whenever someone tells me that discussing online dating is a waste of time, I refer to that anecdote and two sad truths about the online dating industry that Dating Ring’s founders discovered: First, giving people the tools to act on racial bias is profitable; and second, it is not fair to users who are discriminated against to be matched with people who are biased against their racial group and, as a result, will dismiss them as potential matches.So Dating Ring moved away from its original design.If you’re a black woman, as I am, or an Asian man, Ok Cupid data shows that you’re likely to receive fewer matches and messages. It became glaringly obvious that I was getting far fewer matches and messages while online dating than my non-black friends.The people who design and create these sites and tools are working to address this disparity in user experience, but their attempts and failures show just how deeply ingrained racism is in our society.“The researchers realize that their results can be depressing, but they also agree with the many readers who caution against reading too much into the preferences of online daters and speed daters. I married a black man, who I am now (17 years later) divorcing, but the point is that I think the world is FULL of potential, why limit yourself?Yes, these daters clearly discriminate by race and height and looks and other superficial qualities, but they also temper these biases once they get to know one another.” People who are terribly picky in choosing partners online will relax their standards if they spend just three or four minutes talking to someone at a speed dating session. How racist are Americans when it comes to selecting a mate? He only included heterosexual interactions between users who self-identified with the site's five largest racial categories: Black, White, Asian (East Asian), Hispanic/Latino and Indian. has doubled in the past 30 years, according to online dating habits, we're still pretty racist. To examine how racial prejudice affects our romantic decisions, Kevin Lewis, a sociologist at the University of California at San Diego, analyzed messages sent by more than 126,000 Ok Cupid users over a two-and-a-half month period.
They’re just thinking about their own personal preferences. It’s cultural, it’s national, and it’s fucking everywhere. Christian Rudder, co-founder of Ok Cupid, writes: Scrolling through Ok Cupid’s blog, you’ll stumble across a myriad of depressing race stats. I’m a bit surprised at men’s openness to interracial dating.While I’ve personally dated women across the racial spectrum, I’ve only had a handful of clients who ever expressed preferences for women of other races.OK Cupid co-founder Christian Rudder once told NPR, “Black users, especially, there’s a bias against them.Every kind of way you can measure their success on a site — how people rate them, how often they reply to their messages, how many messages they get — that’s all reduced.”More recently, talk of sexual racism has exploded within the gay community, and a number of men using apps like Grindr and Scruff have come forward to discuss the race-based profiles they encounter. Or anything but White.” Another states, “I love men from different cultures. I’m not racist.”Everyone has particular preferences when it comes to sexual partners.“White women prefer white men to the exclusion of everyone else — and Asian and Hispanic women prefer them even more exclusively.” “Men don’t write black women back.” Their gay data reads the same: “Blacks get fewer responses.” Have you closed your browser and crawled into a hole to live out the rest of your days unencumbered by society and its bullshit yet?